ARE YOU LISTENING OPRAH?

One day, fine, or otherwise, I don't know. I don't know, cause now that I'M retired, one day seems like the next. And now I'M really retired. No I don't consider not practicing DENTISTRY being retired, even though it was my only means of supporting my family. No I consider myself retired when I'VE quit going to all the, for lack of a better term, extracurricular activities. Activities such as the 49er LIONS club, PIRS, MAINSTREET, and whatever else I'VE quit. All I have to say about doing all that stuff is that doing those things, going to all those meetings sure kept me busy. It was too busy for someone trying to rehabilitate from having had a catastrophic traumatic brain injury. Nobody really knows what it is like, trying to keep track of everything while putting on your best face, like everything is ok. Like everything is normal, never mind that for the last seven years, I'VE had to be driven around, not just wherever I go but wherever whom ever it is that's driving wants to go. Oh I'M asked where I would like to go but what am I going to say? Oh wherever YOU want to go. Or we have to go someplace for some reason. I can never just go somewhere, and I don't HAVE to have anywhere in particular to go. I'M getting pretty sick of hearing that question, "WHERE WOULD YOU GO IF YOU COULD? You're probably wondering what that title has to do with driving, Well, I'M not sure. Anyhow, OPRAH can you hear me? I wrote that because, I'M hoping to someday get on the OPRAH show, at least get my wife on the show. We both, yes I wrote we both love to watch OPRAH. Let's see, I'VE been watching OPRAH for years now, I don't know how long. However, I'VE always enjoyed her shows, she actually has some of the most interesting guests. And she always has interesting topics for the guests. I would actually like to see, and hear the topic of BRAIN INJURY. I know she's done shows on survivors of a COMA. And most if not all of those individuals have had some form of TBI, traumatic brain injury. However there're many forms of brain injury, and OPRAH never really covered this subject. So, this is going to be a story about how SGT. DR. MILKO tried to get OPRAH'S attention.

SGT. DR. MILKO already tried to get OPRAH'S attention when he saw her down in NAHLENZ. Remember? But, he couldn't get her attention she was busy doing what she had to do to get that string of beads. I think, somebody must've told her, that the men dancers on the street would throw her a string of PEARLS, not just some cheap ol' string of plastic beads. Else she probably wouldn't have done what she did, and I'M not gonna write here what it was that she did, MILKO'S sworn me to secrecy on this. He really wants to get his wife on the OPRAH show. He told me he'd hafta kill me if I ever revealed that information, but he's always saying that. Kill me indeed, if it weren't for me, none of his stories would be public knowledge.

So, SGT. DR. MILKO went ahead and went to CHICAGO, because he didn't think OPRAH was paying him any attention, even though he saw what he saw he was, like the imbecile that he is, going to just show up at the studio doors, and act like a brain injured fool to try to get OPRAH'S attention. What an imbecile he was. Since this was obviously going to fail, he figured he'd just stay at his little brother's place in CHICAGO. However, his little brother's new wife wasn't too all very keen on this. And since his little brother, had no idea MILKO was planning this, he wasn't to keen on this either. As a matter of fact MILKO didn't tell anybody this was his plan, the FARGIN ICEHOLE didn't even tell me, his most trusted CONFIDANT.

Well, as it turned IN this time MILKO never got the chance to make a NUISANCE of himself, and he was real good at that also, he could really be an ASSHOLE when he wanted to be. However as I wrote, he never got the chance as his wife BA, BA, BA…BARBARA ANN got wind of his idea. Hence, she made sure he was busy planning, and packing for a nonexistent trip to HAWAII. So, next time he came up with an idea like that he made sure he was downwind of his wife. As he didn't want her catching wind of it again. And he could've sworn he was downwind this time. However, me thinks it doesn't matter with BA, BA, BA…BARBARA ANN. They've been married at least seventeen years now, and some things they just can't keep from each other. It's been exactly seventeen years. I know, cause MILKO just told me they were in CARMEL for their anniversary, he even showed some pichers to prove it. He said he tried to take some pichers at the MONTEREY BAY AQUARIUM, but he ran out of pichers in his DIGITAL camera. MILKO said I could put the pichers here with his stories. And here's some of em except there're not too many of the AQUARIUM. As I said earlier, he ran out of pichers in his DIGITAL CAMERA. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Above is where the pictures go. So, anywho, MILKO'S still trying to get his wife on the OPRAH show. OPRAH'S a pretty tough cookie though. A pretty good lookin cookie though. And I'M not just sayin that so she'll read this, be flattered and ask us to be on her show. Of course, I am saying that because, I'VE watched her grow, not only smaller, but, from a young kid reporter, at the time, probably my same age, to a fantastic TALK SHOW HOST. You go girl!